Hey,Carter,one more year and you graduate.
- What's waiting for you out there? - Don't know,Nate.
Get a job,make a couple bucks,maybe even buy your papers.
- Will you miss football? - Heck,yeah,I'll miss it,
- but what are you gonna do? - Beats me.
- Nothing much you can do. - You could always go pro.
You know,Stump,there are several time-tested methods
for diverting the defence from the ball carrier.
Throwing your body in front of them with a certain amount of force.
- What,you mean blocking? - Sounds kind of rough.
- You know,that could hurt,Dodge. - Yes,it could.
Frank? You got to get me a blocker.
I've been thinking the same thinking,Dodge,
and I'm looking at this high school kid over at Penrose.
- High school? - Yeah,but he's mature for his age.
Like Bug over there?
57,11...
No,forget the water bucket,Bug. Go and get that ball!
It's the only ball we got.
Keep that dollars. Get rid of it.
- We're down to the third? - Yeah.
Let's give them the Rin Tin Tin.
Okay,Coach,we need another ball.
Well,ask them other fellas,why don't you? That's the only ball we have.
Well,then,you better find one,and fast,or you're gonna have to forfeit.
Forfeit?
- We're creaming these mutts. - The home team provides the game ball.
You don't have another ball,you forfeit the game. That's the rules.
-Where's that written? - It ain't written. It's just the rules.
- Well,I never heard of it. - Maybe you're going deaf,old man.
Dear,there must be better ways to promote the starch business.
Tough loss there,Dodge.
Hate to end a home stand like that on a technicality.
- You ever heard of that rule? - Me? No. I never heard of any rules.
My point exactly. Goddamn rules are ruining the game.
Goddamn rules.
Bug,when you're done with the water,grab my shaving kit from my suitcase.
- Grab your own damn shaving kit! - For Christ's sake,Frank,
how much can a football cost?
You think footballs are grown out of thin air?
So,you get a few simoleons from the Starch King.
Hey,Dodge,do I feel hot to you?
- No more than the next man. - Fever runs in my family,you know.
Everything runs in your family,Ralph,except your feet.
Look what you made me... I have to start again.
It's no big joke. You'll make us miss the train to Milwaukee.
- Milwaukee? What about Akron? - Akron team folded day before yesterday.
- We gonna play Milwaukee instead. - I can't go to Milwaukee.
- I got a wrestling match tonight. - Get out of it.
- It pays $100. - We'll see you when you get back.
- That's okay. I got this kid coming. - The high school kid from Penrose?
Yeah. He can only practise after class,but wait till you see him.
- When's he coming? - He's gonna meet us
at the Waterford station when the train stops.
- Hey,I got an extra fin coming my way. - You lost that last game.
I did not. Dodge,didn't I have this tooth today when we started the game?
Curly,I learnt long ago never to stare directly into your face.
Show me the lost tooth,I'll give you the 5.
If I had it,it wouldn't be lost.
- Ready,Suds? - Yeah,shoot.
The Duluth Bulldogs lost to the Toledo Bullets today
in a dirty game of professional league football,
where a new and dangerous element has been creeping in,rules.
- Goddamn rules. - The lone moment of glory came...
- Say,Joe. - Nice hat,Lexie.
Thanks,I just bought it.
Listen,can you get me in a room with Hank Kelly at the comptroller's desk?
- He won't talk to reporters in fancy hats. - Hey,Lexie. You going hunting?
It's a very expensive hat,your whole year's salary.
Harvey wants to see you in his office.
I'd take that mack off before you go in there.
- You would,would you? - He might think there's an air raid.
Good,boys,complete sentences. Next week,let's try paragraphs.
- Say,Pete,see about Hank Kelly,will you? - He doesn't talk to reporters.
- Say,Harvey. - Nice pitta.
- Don't you start. - Pull up a chair.
Best seat in the house. Who are you,Sarge?
Mack Steiner. Lieutenant.
Lexie,I got one for you.
You ever hear of Carter Rutherford,"the Bullet"?
Football boy? War hero football boy?
Good-looking war hero football boy.
Took time out of college to fight the war.
Got a whole platoon of Jerries to surrender.
Just dropped their guns and gave up from the sound of his voice.
You ought to hire him. Get rid of this pack of geniuses.
- We're gonna do a story on him. - What's your angle?
- It ain't true. - It's all a crock.
The kid's doing radio shows and advertisements.
He's hired a promoter named CC Frazier
to put himself on the cover of every magazine.
I like those razors. - Sure. Who doesn't?
So what's the story,Mack?
I served with him. I was there in the Argonne. He ain't no hero.
You're gonna meet with Carter and CC. He's gonna be in town next month.
And you're gonna do a story on the virtues of the Bullet.
The many virtues!
And then we're gonna break the myth of the War Hero Bullet.
Listen,you got fellas who'd be perfect for this.
Three Knickerbockers out there,for instance,
who'd trade their high school diplomas for a crack at it.
- It's not my kind of story. - Lexie,
CC Frazier wants the Chicago Tribune to do a story on his protege?
We're gonna oblige him,and you're gonna do it.
Can I talk to you alone for a minute?
Captain,would you excuse us?
It's Lieutenant. I'll wait in the hall.
Thanks,Lieutenant.
Why me?
Because it's a big story and you're the best.
Thought you'd say it's 'cause I have the best legs in the office.
No,Joe does.
Okay,Harvey,I'll make you a deal.
If I throw some facts together about this Bombshell...
- Bullet. - Bullet.
- And we chop down his apple tree... - You get the assistant editor's desk.
Okay,Chief.
You get Mack's story,and I'll get you your Bullet.
"The lone moment of glory came in the 4th quarter,
"when Jimmy 'Dodge' Connelly lateraled to Bakes Davis,
"who ran through a trio of open-field tackles
"and into the Duluth end zone.
"And whereas the hotly disputed contest will go down in the books
"as a Toledo victory,the hearts and minds of all who witnessed
"the classic gridiron confrontation were clearly won by the Duluth Bulldogs."
- Awfully good,Suds. - Sure is a great thing to read,Suds.
When the muse strikes,who am I to resist?
It's almost like you were playing the game yourself.
What I try to achieve in my prose is a sense of flight.
Now that's a crowd,ain't it,Dodge?
Sure is. We didn't have crowds like that when I was in school.
You went to college? - Colleges.
Waterford! Waterford next!
Waterford next!
Waterford!
Is that Big Gus Schiller?
- How you doing,boy? - Hey,how you doing?
Here,get in this car.
Boys,I want you to be meeting our newest player.
This is Big Gus Schiller from Penrose High School.
Hi. How you doing? How's it going?
- So you're in high school,are you? - Yeah.
Got held back,did you?
No.
Hey,kid,what position did you play in high school?
Kicker.
- Kicker? - What the hell?
Coach thought it'd be the best position for me.
- Who's your coach? - Math teacher.
Huddle up.
Hooked it.
17,32,24,hike!
God! Right in the...
Gus,look. You stand over here,next to him,and you hit anybody that comes near him.
Anybody that comes near him!
41,
33,37,hike!
Oh,I like him.
Dodge,I need to have a speech with you.
What do you mean folded? Milwaukee can't fold.
They're broke,is what. Like Akron. No money,no team.
We're broke,too.
- We're broke now? Our season just started! - Look,we're broke,I'm telling you.
If you got no money to pay salaries,no money to buy train tickets,
no money to rent a field,then you're broke.
It's over,Dodge. It's time to pack it up and go home.
The Starch King is gonna sell us 51% of the team as soon as he can.
What's gonna happen to these guys?
I don't know.
And I thought the Milwaukee game would turn it around,
what with Big Gus coming on board for us.
Milwaukee got Joe Washburn playing good,but...
Now there's no Milwaukee game.
It's finished.
Half these guys will probably end up back in the mines.
This isn't exactly the cream of America's work force.
They don't have a lot of options.
Shit!
I'll read you what he had to say.
"I regret to inform you that Perennial Starch
"is hereby terminating our sponsorship of the Duluth Bulldogs."
So that's it,fellas.
It's the end of the line for us.
This will be your last paycheque. From here on out,you're on your own.
But I want to say what a privilege it's been to coach you boys.
What you've done on the field has been amazing.
Big Gus,I want to say to you,son,thank you for coming.
- Name? - Connelly.
Dodge Connelly.
- Age? - 38.
39?
45. Skill?
How do you mean?
Are you a welder or a machinist or a pipe fitter? You know,skills.
I got you.
Did you serve in the war?
- Yes. - Well,you must have learnt a trade there.
Not one you'd like.
Mr Connelly,if you have no trade skills,
how have you made a living in the last 20 years?
- A cup of coffee. How much is coffee? - 10 cents.
Here's 15. You keep it.
Now I can buy that house I always wanted.
And while only halfway through the Princeton season,
Carter "the Bullet" Rutherford has piled on a whopping 14 touchdowns
and 720 yards.
We spoke to the Medal of Honor winner after the game.
- Carter,how you feeling? - Feel pretty good,Mac.
Their defence just kept coming at you,but I figured I might get around them
if I just put my mind to it.
Guess I've learnt something from dodging those Jerries.
And that's the kind of bravery on display every Saturday,folks.
The kind of fearlessness that brings in those fans by the thousands.
Some 40,000 people on hand just last Saturday.
Now here's a little ditty I'm sure you'll all know.
40,000 people?
I'm trying to reach CC Frazier. Do you know how...
Well,why can't you tell me?
Listen,my name's Connelly. It's about football.
I've never heard of you,either,Miss.
No,what I... Hello?
Sheez!
- 'Cause I said I liked your dress? - Stop saying that!
- It's true. - It's boring.
- It's all I wanted to say. - I'm starting to think it's all you can say.
- What's your name? - Leonard.
Leonard,you better run along before my fiance gets here.
He's far less tolerant of your existence than I am.
There's no reason to be angry. I was simply paying you a compliment.
Stop it. You're just acting like a big baby 'cause you miss your mother's bosoms.
- My mother's what? - Her bosoms,you goof!
You're substituting my bosoms for your mother's.
- What? No,I'm not. - Why not? What's wrong with my bosoms?
Honestly,Miss Littleton,we're in public. The rules of etiquette apply.
Leonard,it's 1925. There are no rules.
Except that boys like you are tedious until they're 40,
at which point they become unbearably tedious.
- I didn't come over here to be insulted. - No? Where do you usually go?
And don't think just 'cause you haven't said anything
that I don't know what you're up to.
I'm talking to you,behind the magazine.
Don't you know I could have you arrested for eavesdropping?
- Excuse me? - Or are you really an avid reader
- of Ladies' Home Journal? - I never miss an issue.
I see.
- Waiting for someone? - I'm sorry,were you speaking to me?
No,just practising my American accent. Of course I was speaking to you.
As a matter of fact,I was waiting for someone.
- Who? - A business associate.
A business associate. So cryptic. So manly.
Clearly beyond the comprehension of a feeble female.
If you say so.
What I want to know is why you chose to come in here from the lobby,
where you obviously had business,
to sit next to me and listen to my conversation?
Tell me. Or are you afraid to say?
I'm not afraid to say it.
I'm in love with Leonard.
Go ahead and laugh,everyone does.
We had something beautiful until you came along.
You think you can just toss him away like a sack of flour.
- That's funny. - Hey,haven't you done enough?
No,really,who are you?
- What's your name? - I'm Dodge.
- Dodge Connelly of Duluth,Minnesota. - Lexie Littleton. Champaign,Illinois.
Hey,Lexie,what are you doing for dinner?
You're a lot of fun,Mr Connelly,
and I'm sorry I'm not gonna get to know you better,
but you should leave before my fiance gets here. He's kind of big.
- I can handle myself. - No,really,Mr Connelly.
Mr Connelly is buried next to my mother. I'm Dodge.
- Dodge,it'd be better if you go. - Better for whom?
Don't get familiar,Mr Connelly.
Just because we had a laugh doesn't mean you know me.
- My apologies. - Apology accepted.
But I do know you.
- You think so? - Oh,yeah.
- Really? - Yeah.
You're the kind of cocktail that comes on like sugar,
but gives you a kick in the head.
The only thing you hate worse than a guy making a play
is when a guy doesn't make a play.
Were you making a play? I hadn't realised.
It might work on my Aunt Lurleen. She's a little near-sighted.
There's an article on peach-canning in here that I'm dying to get back to.
Well,I know you,too,Dodge Connelly.
You think you're the slickest operator in Duluth,and maybe you are,
but being the slickest operator in Duluth is kind of like being the world's tallest midget,
- if you ask me. - It's too bad we know each other so well.
- We might have gotten along. - Well,I'll live.
Alone.
Lexie?
Mr Frazier,Lexie Littleton.
I do apologise for keeping you waiting.
- So,where is this cute boyfriend of mine? - Well,I thought he was behind me.
There he is now.
He finds it very difficult moving around in public.
Carter.
Say,CC!
He loves his fans.
Carter,this is Miss Littleton of the Tribune. She's doing a piece on you.
Well,that'll be fine.
- A pleasure,Mr Rutherford. - Carter,Miss Littleton.
Lexie,Carter.
- Say,CC... - There you are.
Could you bring the car around? We're ready to leave.
- I don't think this gentleman works here. - No?
He certainly looks like the retrieving type.
- Do you work here,Dodge? - No,CC,I came to talk to you.
Yes,well,I'm afraid we're going to dinner. Come,let's find a real valet,shall we?
I have $20,000 that says you might want to talk.
So if I understand you correctly,Mr Connelly,
it's your intention to legitimise professional football?
- That's right. - Well,let me say straight off,
there's no such beast as professional football.
There's only miners and farmers and shell-shocked veterans of the Great War,
smashing each other's skulls together
in a million turnip fields from Duluth to East Jesus.
Now I ask you,how do you intend to legitimise that?
By keeping it alive,by investing in a team.
Well,you see,there's the catch. I'm not interested in investing.
I'm more of a 20-percenter. New talent,new ideas interest me.
Professional football does not attract new talent,
and investing in a professional football team is not a new idea.
Dodge,
we had some laughs a few years ago.
- You had some laughs. - Yes.
Yes,I guess I did.
- So... - Okay.
How about this for a new idea?
Carter Rutherford leaves Princeton to play for the Duluth Bulldogs.
- What? - Hear me out.
Carter,you're a pretty remarkable guy,aren't you?
- I just play football. - You don't have to be modest with me.
I know your story.
How you put your education on hold to serve your country,to fight in the war.
I was just doing what I thought was right.
The President gave you a medal for bravery.
I was just in the right place at the right time.
That's not what the papers said. They called you the hero of the Argonne.
Then,when you went back to school,you turned out to be a football hero,too.
- Mr Connelly,I'm just a guy... - Carter.
Do kids chase you down the hallway at school?
Sometimes.
Follow you around? Ask you for an autograph?
It happens,yeah,but you can't take that stuff too seriously.
You feel like sometimes everybody wants something from you?
And how are you compensated for living your life under that kind of public scrutiny?
By paying tuition to Princeton.
Let me ask you a question. Do you like playing football?
I love playing football.
Good. You got one more year and that's it. That's all she wrote.
What are you gonna do then?
Actually,I've already been accepted to Yale Law School.
I have a position waiting for me at Hager,Danes and Upton
when I get my law degree.
It turns out,I'm not too bad a student,when I put my mind to it.
You... That's good. It's good.
And all of that will be waiting for you,no question about it.
But the world's full of good lawyers.
In football,there's only one Carter Rutherford.
You don't need any more teaching to be what you are out on the field.
You ought to be playing football,and you ought to be rewarded for your talent.
Makes sense. Sort of.
So did bloodletting at the time.
You're very passionate,Mr Connelly. What exactly do you have in mind?
Carter Rutherford takes a temporary leave from Princeton to play for Duluth,
and in exchange he is guaranteed $5,000 a game.
Let's you and I have another drink,Mr Connelly.
You're the boss.
Why don't you two run along,conduct your interview,
whilst Mr Connelly and I thrash out your future?
Come on,Carter.
Carter Rutherford wouldn't sit on a bench for that kind of money.
Did I say 5? I meant 10.
I assume you'll be paying this out of the gate receipts?
- That's right. - Of course,I'll want it in the form
of a guarantee. Plus I get a percentage of the overages.
Of course. In the neighbourhood of 5%.
I was thinking a little more uptown.
- 10? - 25.
I'll understand if you decline. Most teams would.
Most,but not all.
Sudsy? Listen up.
Carter Rutherford's gonna be playing for the Duluth Bulldogs starting Sunday.
We're... What? No,just listen. We're taking a Pullman to Duluth tonight.
We're gonna get there in the morning. Round up everybody you can.
Get the word around. I want a nice welcoming committee when we pull in.
What? Just trust me. Thanks,pal.
Harvey,change of plans. I'm taking a train with these knuckleheads to Duluth.
What? No,I haven't been drinking! It's a long story.
Just give me a few days. Hey,how'd it go with Mack Steiner?
So don't use his name.
Believe me,Harvey,by the end of the week,this kid will cook his own goose.
I got to go.
Hey,what are you doing?
Sorry.
You know,truth be told,I was a better baseball player.
But college baseball isn't too popular.
What about the war? Where'd all that courage come from?
I don't know about courage.
A platoon of German soldiers surrendered to you.
Quite a few have made a lot out of much less.
Let's talk about something else.
Like,how did Miss Lexie Littleton get so curious
- she worked her way up a newspaper room? - Not really the homemaker type.
Depends on the home,I guess.
This is me.
- An eventful day,Mr Bullet. - Good night,Lexie.
Bright and early,Bullet. You got a big day ahead.
Hey,Lexie,
you think I did the right thing about this Duluth deal?
I think you did the right thing about the Duluth deal.
Well,I'm glad.
I'm happy you're glad.
Good night.
I'm glad you're glad.
You've got a lot of moxie!
I didn't know it was your berth. I would have armed myself.
I'm calling the porter.
- I'm not decent. - Well,there's an understatement!
Neither are you.
- You looked? - I glanced.
- Need help with that hook? - No.
- Good evening. - Yes,it is.
You know,this may seem a little awkward
coming from the man who only promotes the man of your dreams,
but I've had a little thought.
- Perhaps it can wait till tomorrow? - Probably,but that's not my style.
You see,Miss Littleton,Carter is very important to me.
I want to make sure you treat him fairly in your newspaper.
- I resent the implication that I wouldn't. - Lexie,
Carter is good for the country. He's a war hero.
Good for the Tribune,they sell newspapers. Good for me.
- Good for you. - Lexie...
I'm having a conversation with a rather beautiful woman,
and she and I were wondering if you'd care to join us for a nightcap?
- Good night,CC. - Good night,Lexie.
- What? - I think I'll sleep up here tonight.
You most certainly will not!
Really?
"Believe me,Harvey,by the end of the week,this kid will cook his own goose."
- You were spying on me! - I was observing.
- So,you want to play dirty? - Maybe later. I'm a little tired right now.
So here we are.
- Not sure what the next move is. - It happens.
- It's the first time for me. - They all say that.
- I'm sure you snore. - Attagirl!
Listen,I'm sorry if what I said today upset you.
Don't be.
- Which part? - The "kick in the head" part.
It's forgotten.
- I'm sorry if what I said today upset you. - Don't be.
- Which part? - The "tallest midget" part.
What about the "I know you" part?
- I still mean that. - Then I'm still upset.
- You're the tops! - Hey,Carter!
Carter! Carter!
It's a three-ring circus with Carter as the dancing bear.
Yeah. Wonder what that makes us.
Dodge,look,look! Welcome to show business!
Hi!
When's the last Princeton game,Carter?
I guess I already played it.
So,you going to shake up the team? Anybody you want fired?
No,no,no,of course not. I'm not the coach. Besides,they're a great bunch of players.
Hey,where the hell is everybody?
CC moved practise over to Ennis Field,at the university.
What?
Why?
Is it illustrated?
- You're late. - Says who?
It's 8:30. You're late.
- How's your story coming? - Swell,thanks.
Cooked his goose yet?
You get crowds like this when you practised?
- By the thousands. - Yeah,I'll bet.
Dodge!
You saw the crowd? For a practise!
I tell you,our shit has really come in! And look at this!
- That must make you happy,huh? - It must.
- Hey,Dodge,you see the new uniforms? - Can you believe it?
Yeah.
Hey,Dodgie,look at this thing!
- Brand spanking new! - Nice.
- Hey,Dodge. - Hey,Dodge.
Hey,fellas.
Hey,Dodge,you missed callisthenics.
- Thank God! - Couple of plays we ran at Princeton.
- A couple? - Now,I was thinking,
we should switch to the Single Back Formation
rather than sticking with the Wing. What do you think?
Well,the Single Back's good,but,see,the way we ran the team...
- Which one is me? - That's you,right there,behind the guard.
I guess I should get a couple of diagrams of the plays we run.
Sure. Yeah. These are a lot like your plays,only a little more effective.
- Well,a lot of our plays are pretty strong. - Some yes,some no.
But all that matters is that we win. We want to win,don't we,boys?
Yeah! - You said it,Carter!
Hey,they're here! Come on,fellas!
- You're a 10.5,right,Dodge? - 11.
Well,today's the big day,folks.
Princeton's Carter Rutherford is playing his first professional game,
and it's right here at Ennis Field with Duluth's own Bulldogs.
People have been coming in to town all week
from locations as far as Akron,Ohio and Lexington,Kentucky
just to get a glimpse of the 6'3" phenom.
Tickets are 75 cents adults and 25 cents for the rascals under 12.
And if you're a Huskers fan,it's $10.
Just kidding,gang. We love those Cleveland fans.
See you at the game.
Come on,folks! Root for Carter! Go,Bulldogs!
They're calling for rain today,boys.
- Hey! What's a girl doing in the press box? - Rutherford says she knows her stuff.
Yeah? I'm thinking maybe he knows her stuff.
- Who you write for,honey? - Tribune,fatso.
- Since when do they cover pro football? - Since I decided to write about it.
- You planning on taking notes? - No. Got a mind like an elephant.
It's like the Library of Congress up there. Nothing gets lost. Nothing gets stolen.
- Ain't that right,Bob? - Bill!
Here we go.
2,34,hike!
That Carter is really something,huh?
Great catch,Dodge. - Nice,Dodge.
23,hike!
13,12,11,10,9,8,7,6,5,
4,3,2,1!
Bulldogs!
See you,boys.
"In his eagerly awaited debut as a professional football player,
"Carter 'the Bullet' Rutherford ran for an astonishing 162 yards.
"Given his reported salary,that's nearly $100 a yard.
"But the fleet-footed newcomer earned every penny.
"Unstoppable,unbeatable and uncatchable,
"the Bullet has arrived,and pro football
"will never be the same."
Well,he had a little help out there,Dodge. You sure you want me to write it like that?
- We didn't fold,did we? - No,we didn't fold,Dodge.
- He's a hell of a player. - Yeah.
- And what do you get out of all this? - 10% of your gross income.
10% of our...
It's very little,when you consider how much I can increase your salary.
Well,just ask Carter. MGM wants to sign him to a contract.
You think that I could be in the movies?
Sure,Zoom. Just buy a ticket.
Now,I want you to peruse this diet and exercise plan,
which Carter has evolved for aspiring athletes.
The Rutherford Diet,patent pending,is based on scientific research.
So,tell me,where could I find a Lexie Littleton?
- Chicago,I guess. There are a lot of us. - Well,then I'm going to Chicago.
How old are you?
- A gentleman doesn't ask... - I'm not a gentleman.
I'm a football player. Are you 30?
I'm just shy of that mark,thank you. How old are you? 24?
Just past that mark,thank you.
- That's a lie. - Yes,it is.
- I'm 31. - Yup.
Do you have a question?
Pro football's got a completely different style,Carter.
They play two,three games a week. How do you plan on adjusting to that?
Well,maybe they'll kind of adjust to me.
There goes the gun. Is it possible,folks?
With this young man,well,yes,it is! Touchdown!
You ready,Mickey? Okay,flash.
"With another eye-opening display of canny passing
"and superb broken-field running,Carter 'the Bullet' Rutherford
"led the Bulldogs to victory
"over an increasingly forlorn Pottsville team.
"The choice that awaits these teams is to imitate the college techniques
"that Rutherford has transplanted to the pro game
"or to fall hopelessly behind in the standings.
"What is certain are the crowds that this Duluth team is attracting.
"And the gate receipts that are rolling in should open every team's eyes
"to the fact that Rutherford's Bulldogs
"have launched a new era in professional football."
That ought to hold them.
I'll get back to you tomorrow after the Panther game.
- Okay,Lexie. - Give me that.
Lexie.
- I know,Harvey. - It's been four weeks. Where's my war hero?
Everyone's a little coy. This story will loosen them up.
Just give me a little more time.
I just don't want another sports fan writing a love letter.
Dust off that editor's desk,Harvey.
Assistant editor.
Stump,feel like crashing a gin mill or two?
No,thanks,Dodge. Some other time,maybe.
Hey,what do you say,Curly? Feel like hitting the town?
No,I'm hitting the hay instead,Dodge. Sorry.
Zoom,you old lounge lizard,what do you say?
Gee,Dodge,I can't. There's a curfew.
A curfew? Since when?
We voted on the train.
Where was I?
Asleep.
I would have left you,too. - Was that a bad move? I sent her flowers.
Well,then all is forgiven.
Yes,it is.
Why don't you like to talk about the Argonne?
- Who's asking? - Just me.
Stories get bigger over time.
- You never went to France. - No,not that big.
Everything they say happened,happened.
It's just that the telling of it gets a little better.
How much better?
We were pinned down in a gully.
We were there about three days,I guess.
It had been raining for about a week.
So some of the fellas and I,
we hunkered down in a foxhole,and we just waited for the weather to break.
A writer from The Times was with us.
Now,you know I never drink,but it was so cold and so wet.
I started to take a few slugs off a flask.
Easy there,Carter. That stuff will melt your teeth.
Ja! Sehr gut.
- Tell me again. Ich gebe surrender? - Auf.
Ich gebe auf. If you have no way out,you lay down your rifle
and yell,"Ich gebe auf," otherwise they'll shoot you.
Ich gebe auf!
We were nearly out of ammo,we were down to about nine fellas,
and we had this plan that we were gonna speak enough German
to get us out of there. Take our chances in a war camp.
All through the night the fighting continued,until we were all out of ammo.
Sitting ducks. And we had been up for 36 hours.
That,and the drinking...
Okay,fellas,we ain't taking this spot any time soon.
So let's call it a night and try again.
I don't know how long I was there.
But it had to have been a few hours,
because by that time,the Jerries had taken the foxhole.
But I was so covered up,they never saw me.
And I never saw them.
I knew we were goners,so I jumped up,and I yelled,"Ich gebe auf!"
- Ich gebe auf! - Ich gebe auf!
They thought I was one of them,so they just dropped their weapons.
They just gave up.
Ich gebe auf! I'm unarmed!
And it was right about then that I started to have a really bad feeling.
Carter?
When it was all sorted out,
the Lieutenant thought it was best if we all just kept our mouths shut.
One for The Times,Private.
Let the chips fall where they may.
And then the story got bigger.
The President gave you a medal.
I would have made liars out of all the fellas.
We were stuck.
That's a lot of responsibility for a young man.
I grew up pretty fast.
It's quite a story.
And now you know.
Are we still friends?
There's this one joint off of Halstead that's at the bottom of a meat locker.
Hey,Mikey. And you have to walk through all this meat,
like hanging beef,like beef,like bacon beef.
And by the time you get in there,you smell like a brewery.
Butcher shop. - Butcher shop.
Mr Ziegfeld says that I'm the best dancer in the line-up.
- You don't say. - Yeah.
My kicks are so high that I almost knock myself out.
That's dangerous. - Yeah,well...
And I'm super flexible,too.
I can arch my back so that my head hits my heels.
Watch yourself there.
Is Carter Rutherford very tall? 'Cause he looks really tall.
But maybe that's just because you're kind of short.
Hey.
- Hiya,Dodge. Come on in. - Hey,Sully.
- Evening,Dodge. - Mr Mayor.
You know the Mayor?
I ought to. I voted for him five times in the last election.
Well,if it isn't Dodge Connelly,middle-aged boy wonder.
Why,Lexie Littleton,breaking curfew.
I won't tell if you don't.
Let me introduce you to Miss Belinda Whippleworth.
- A pleasure. - Charmed.
I have to pee.
Enchanting girl. I thought you had to be 21 to get into a place like this.
She is 21.
I meant her IQ.
I wasn't planning on running her for Congress.
No? What were you planning on doing with her?
You know,the usual.
Put her in shoulder pads and a helmet,and knock her brains out?
I think somebody beat me to it.
She'll do well in Congress.
You're only as young as the women you feel.
How quiet it must be at the Algonquin with you here in Duluth.
So,are you flying solo,or is the Bullet casting about?
What do you care? You're here to entertain Miss Nipplewidth.
It wouldn't look good for you to get caught in a place like this.
I'd dare say it wouldn't look good for anyone to be caught in a place like this.
Come on,let's dance.
Hey.
Come on.
What happened tonight?
Our boy's taken a liking to yours truly.
Seems mutual,if you ask me.
So much so
that he felt compelled to clear his conscience on his Sergeant York routine.
You mean he didn't take out a whole platoon with a bow and arrow?